Wie Sie Panik und Erstarrung vermeiden:
Ein Gespräch mit Kinderwunschberaterin Kathrin Steinke
![heilpraktiker kinderwunsch](https://paleo-mama.de/wp-content/uploads/2017/01/DSC7654-1.jpg)
Heilpraktikerin Kathrin Steinke
Als ich zum ersten mal auf die Webseite von Kathrin Steinke gestoßen bin, dachte ich, wie gut es heutige Frauen mit spätem Kinderwunsch haben – vor nur zehn Jahren waren solche Angebote nur sehr selten.
Kathrins Kompetenzen und Erfahrungen sind so vielfältig, dass ich sofort dachte, mit Kathrin möchte ich zusammenarbeiten! Anfangen wollte ich mit einigen Fragen zu den Themen, die für meine Leserinnen von Interesse sind.
Kathrin, was würdest Du im Allgemeinen Frauen über 35 empfehlen, deren Wunsch nach einem Kind, sich noch nicht erfüllt hat?
Bevor ich zu allgemeinen Ratschlägen komme, möchte ich vorweg kurz erklären, warum sich immer mehr Frauen jenseits der 30-er mit dem Thema Kinderwunsch beschäftigen.
Frauen, die zu mir in die Praxis kommen berichten häufig, dass ihr Kinderwunsch erst entstanden ist, als sie sich sicher in ihrer Beziehung fühlten und auch jobmäßig ein gewisser Stand erreicht war.
Häufig sind das auch Frauen oder Paare, die einen langen Ausbildungsweg mit Studium hinter sich haben. Das bedeutet, dass viele tatsächlich schon 35 Jahre oder älter sind, bevor sie den Wunsch nach einem Kind wahrnehmen, zulassen und auch ernsthaft verfolgen können. Sie bringen ein inneres Bild von „Kinder können wir später noch haben“ mit und haben die Erfahrung gemacht „Wenn ich mich für etwas richtig anstrenge, dann bekomme ich das auch…“. Oft ist das dann der Punkt, an dem Frauen oder Paare zu mir kommen.
Ganz allgemein, wenn das Paar um keine Vorerkrankungen weiß, körperlich scheinbar alles in Ordnung ist, würde ich empfehlen über den nächsten Zyklus den Hormonstatus der Frau zu erheben (das macht die Frauenärztin),
aber auch den Partner zum Andrologen bzw. Urologen zu schicken, um ein Spermiogramm anfertigen zu lassen. Ich habe häufig erlebt, dass Paare viele Monate manchmal auch Jahre zu den fruchtbaren Tagen Sex hatten, sich dann aber herausstellte, dass es zu wenig Eisprünge gab, eine hormonelle Fehlfunktion vorlag oder das Spermiogramm aufgrund einer früheren Erkrankung so schlecht war, dass es praktisch keine zeugungsfähigen Spermien gab.
Ich halte es für sehr wichtig, über den eigenen Körper Bescheid zu wissen. Nur so kann ich für mich passende Entscheidungen treffen. Wichtig ist dabei jedoch auch, nicht in Panik zu verfallen wenn der nächste Geburtstag naht – Angst ist wie Stress kein fruchtbarkeitsstärkender Faktor.
Weiterhin könnte das Paar sich fragen: „Wie sieht unser derzeitiges Leben aus – ernähren wir uns gesund?“. Dabei ist tatsächlich auch zu klären, was unter „gesund“ verstanden wird.
Wie sind die derzeitigen Belastungen im Leben?
Steht ein Jobwechsel oder ein Umzug an?
Eine Kinderwunschbehandlung bedeutet einen enormen Kraftakt, der nicht „einfach so nebenher“ absolviert werden kann. Einige sehen es wie ein berufliches „Projekt“, das mit viel Disziplin angegangen wird und sind dann frustriert, wenn der Erfolg ausbleibt. Die Erfahrung, dass man für sein Wohlverhalten (kein Alkohol, kein Nikotin, gesunde Ernährung, Entspannungskurs am Wochenende…) nicht belohnt wird, kann sehr schmerzhaft sein.
Mit meinem naturheilkundlichen Blick als Heilpraktikerin würde ich auch schauen, ob es andere „Störfelder“ im Körper gibt – wie z.B. Amalgamfüllungen – oder hormonelle Symptome (PMS) oder ein unzureichender Aufbau der Gebärmutterschleimhaut aufgrund jahrelanger Einnahme der Pille.
Wie fit ist das Immunsystem? Oder nehme ich jeden Infekt mit und haben ständig Blasenentzündungen?
Auch eine grundlegende Entgiftung kann sinnvoll sein (die Chinesische Medizin würde sagen „Das Nest säubern“).
Gibt es einige Ratschläge, was man vermeiden sollte, wenn man versucht, schwanger zu werden?
Ich habe großes Verständnis für Frauen, die in die Versuchung geraten, ihre Fruchtbarkeit optimieren zu wollen – und die Fruchtbarkeit des Partners gleich mit. Der große Fehler, der dabei häufig gemacht wird (und ich spreche da auch aus eigener Erfahrung … ) ist: Zuviel auf einmal.
Es erzeugt Stress, wenn ich nach meinem vollen Arbeitspensum versuche, noch zweimal die Woche zum Hormon-Yoga zu gehen, die Kinderwunschmassage in die Mittagspause lege, zur Akupunktur eile, gewöhnungsbedürftige Tees trinke, hoffentlich nicht vergessen habe meine Globulis und die Vitamine einzunehmen… und mir jegliche Freude versage.
Das kann auf Dauer nicht gut gehen und erhöht eher das Level der Stresshormone im Körper, die ich nicht zu den fruchtbarkeitsfördernden Faktoren zähle.
Was sollte man noch vermeiden?
In Panik und Erstarrung zu verfallen. Lass mich dazu etwas aus meinem Praxisalltag berichten: Ich erkläre den gestressten, verzweifelten, manchmal entmutigten Frauen mit Kinderwunsch Folgendes:
„Sie haben nie darum gebeten, aber so ist es nun mal… Sie haben jetzt einen schwarzen Hund an Ihrer Seite. Der steht für all die Ängste und Zweifel, die aus den Enttäuschungen über jede monatliche Blutung erwachsen sind.
Können Sie ihn sehen?
Spüren Sie mal genau hin, an welcher Seite er gerade ist und wie groß? Dieser Hund ist jetzt da, aber Sie können dafür sorgen, dass er Sie nicht die ganze Zeit anspringt und bellt! Schauen Sie ihn an und weisen Sie ihm den Platz zu, wo Sie ihn gut aushalten können! Trainieren Sie ihn!“.
Das erstaunliche ist, dieser Hund wird im Laufe der Zeit kleiner und ungefährlicher, aber er bringt den Frauen auch etwas Wichtiges: Sich nicht von ihrer Angst beherrschen zu lassen, sondern einen Umgang damit zu erlernen.
Und ebenfalls wichtig: Ihr Kinderwunsch hat seine Berechtigung! Manche Frauen nehmen jahrelang Rücksicht auf ihren Partner: der vielleicht in einem wichtigen Projekt steckt, seine Dissertation schreiben will oder den Kinderwunsch viel weniger verspürt… Sie verschieben dann das eigene Bedürfnis und leiden darunter. Meine Empfehlung: Frauen sollten den Mut aufbringen, ihren Wunsch immer wieder zu äußern – im wahrsten Sinne des Wortes dem Partner auch mal zu „zumuten“, dass es bei ihnen gerade ganz anders aussieht, um darüber im Gespräch – in der Auseinandersetzung – zu sein.
Noch interessant:
In drei Monaten bessere Eizellen: Eine Zellbiologin verrät, wie es geht
Naturheilkunde bei unerfülltem Kinderwunsch: Im Gespräch mit Heilpraktikerin Julia Nitzsche
BYE BYE unerfüllter Kinderwunsch – Storchgeflüster Kurse von Julia Neuen
Welche Methoden aus der Naturheilkunde wendest Du an?
Ich bin von der ganzheitlichen Sicht auf den Menschen überzeugt. Dazu gehört es nicht nur, ein isoliertes Symptom oder Problem im Blick zu haben, um es „weg zu machen“.
Ich bediene mich unterschiedlicher naturheilkundlicher Methoden wie z.B. der Pflanzenheilkunde (Phytotherapie) und verwende dabei fast ausschließlich Pflanzen, die in unserem Kulturkreis vorkommen.
Diese Pflanzen haben sich wie wir auch über die Zeit an eben genau diesen Lebensraum angepasst und enthalten so für uns die größte Heilkraft. Mit Pflanzen kann man sowohl innerlich (Tees, homöopathische Aufbereitungen, Tinkturen), als auch äußerlich wunderbar arbeiten.
Daneben bin ich eine große Anhängerin der Heilkunde von Hildegard von Bingen, die neben den Heilmitteln einen wesentlichen Aspekt in der Ernährung und Lebensführung sieht. Das ist weder „verstaubt und mittelalterlich“ noch „unzeitgemäß“. Viele Untersuchungen belegen mittlerweile die Wirksamkeit von Bertram, Dinkel und Co.
Und mit einem Seitenblick beziehe ich, wenn es angebracht erscheint, auch die Elementenlehre des TCM mit in die Behandlung ein.
Meine naturheilkundliche Arbeit verbinde ich stets mit der psychotherapeutischen Arbeit und entwickle zusammen mit der Frau oder dem Paar eine Vorgehensweise, die auch z.B. Hypnotherapie mit einschließt. Also die Beschäftigung mit „den inneren Bildern“. Der Kopf „trennt“ sich als bewertende Instanz oft vom Bauch und kritisiert, warum Bauch oder Gebärmutter „nicht richtig funktionieren“. Diese Trennung gilt es wieder aufzuheben.
Gibt es typische Stress-Anzeichen, die bei Paaren mit unerfülltem Kinderwunsch auftreten?
Mögliche Zeichen oder Symptome, die darauf hinweisen, dass ein belastender Zustand herrscht, können depressive Verstimmung, sexuelle Unlust, ständig wiederkehrende Konflikte in der Beziehung, Versagensängste oder sozialer Rückzug sein. Manche flüchten in Aktionismus, lenken sich durch Arbeit ab oder stürzen sich gleich auf den nächsten Versuch. Darüberhinaus: Frauen suchen eher das Gespräch, Männer versuchen vieles erst mal „mit sich alleine auszumachen“.
Was hat sich bei Dir in der Praxis als besonders erfolgreich erwiesen, Frauen darin zu unterstützen, schwanger zu werden und ein gesundes Kind zu bekommen?
Der oben beschriebene ganzheitliche Ansatz, Seele und Körper Zuwendung zu schenken, damit eine gute Basis für eine Schwangerschaft entstehen kann, hat sich für meine Arbeit mit den Frauen und Paaren als sehr fruchtbar erwiesen. Die Seele benötigt Unterstützung im Umgang mit Angst, Enttäuschungs – und Verlusterfahrungen und im Wiederfinden der heilsamen inneren Bilder.
Wunderbar unterstützend hierbei ist Hypnose. Ich habe eigens zum Thema Kinderwunsch die CDs/MP3s Kinderwunsch Relax mit speziellen Trance-Übungen entwickelt, die Frauen ganz entspannt zu Hause hören können. Die dabei wieder gefundene Entspannung hilft, mit dem Warten und dem Ungewissen besser umgehen zu können.
Gleichsam wie die Seele, benötigt auch der Körper Zuwendung durch Stärkung seiner fruchtbarkeitsfördernden Kräfte wie z.B. Ernährung, Entgiftung, Heilmittel und Entspannung. Wesentlich dabei ist jedoch, wie ich schon an anderer Stelle betonte, Maß zu halten: Nicht „viel hilft viel“, sondern eher kleine Veränderungen, die man in den Alltag integrieren kann, über einen gewissen Zeitraum beizubehalten.
Und so freue ich mich über jede neue Schwangerschaftsmeldung und begleite auf Wunsch die Frauen auch durch die Schwangerschaft. Denn der „schwarze Hund“ ist dann zwar meist schon „stubenrein und ungefährlich“, aber bei vielen Frauen in den ersten Wochen der Schwangerschaft durchaus noch präsent…
Mehr Informationen zu meiner Arbeit, zu meinen Angeboten wie auch zur Frauengruppe und Hörbeispiele zu den CDs / MP3s Kinderwunsch Relax finden Sie bei Interesse auf meiner Webseite.
Danke liebe Kathrin für die vielen wunderbaren Gedanken!
Bis nächste Woche,
Darja
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